|Posted on November 30, 2018 at 7:50 AM||comments (6)|
Pandora's Box - Aurthur Rackham
Its day 27 and since day 21 I have known my womb will shed her lining and flow this coming waning moon. The grief has been skin deep bubbling up in loud inconvenient out bursts. It’s hard to give her voice when she arrives at such trixy times. It’s hard to stuff her back down so that I can function when I know she needs to flow out for release in the same way my crimson tide will flow from between my thighs. She comes at the edge of time, liminal transitions from solitude to company, off duty to on duty. There was more hope than usual from my attendance at the altar of ovulation this passing cycle.
Part of my civilised self has put a time limit on this tidal wave expression of grief. Surely this has been cried over enough; surely my heart can heal and move on. Grief is such a hard thing. There is no right or wrong way to grieve, it is not linear. It comes in storms, grey black dark clouds blowing across highlands and low lands, sometimes gifting rainbows but always raining a vulnerable undoing.
On February 13th 2018 my dear wombheart sister Colette Nolan died. She left this world in a deep peaceful meditative sleep. She was ready to leave her weary boned body and fly free from such a debilitating illness, free to be the huge incredible love ambassador she was and still is. Her love shines down still on all who knew her and people still feel her presence through the incredible life she lived. I felt her as she passed in the no-space, not of her body, yet still within this astral field here on earth, it was very a cosmic experience for me and it held me close to her for quite some time after her passing. Holding a water ceremony at her Celebration of Life in honour of her sacred request to be buried at sea felt like a treasure and a way of holding her in the highest regard; it was also a way to show as much love as I could muster for her.
At the time of Colette’s Breast Cancer diagnosis in the summer of 2016 I felt very indignant, NO, full blown rage actually!! She was 34 with a new baby boy. It had me shouting and ranting in my car whilst driving. It had me raving about wasting time, not living half-lives and seizing the day. On Colette’s passing all this anger and rage came flooding back in. I was utterly broken open and it struck me, I had been living a half-life! I had been dragging around ungrieved threads from my past. The grief of Colette’s death burst open Pandora’s Box of all the unmet shadows of grief that I had denied or been too afraid to face. I didn’t want to be living a half-life, to waste this precious gift which had been taken from such a golden light in my life. I wanted to live my life to the fullest, be awake, present and vital, seize the day but now I could see that I had squeezed myself tight into some contorted shapes to mask this deep soul aching truth...
...and that painful truth is the deep longing of motherhood. The womb longing, the breast longing the, the cunt deep longing of feeling a being birthed of me, through me and in turn, birth myself through the gates of Motherhood. To bring my full self to the altar of motherhood, this felt to me an adage of true adulthood.
Sadly this has been a tormented journey for me, rife with physical labels and apparent reasons for us not finding one day we’ve been blessed with a happy accident or a long tried for prayer. Endometriosis, cycts and fibroids have caused many symptoms over the years. My lifetime’s vocation has come from walking my talk and doing the healing work first, embodying my Chiron in Aries as the wounded healer. I have been the guinea pig for the practices I share, the healing and the mentoring I offer. Healing my womb and all of Her calls to be known and seen have led me on this curious deeply feminine adventure that has been a gift and a blessing. It has helped me learn about myself so that I can be an authentic guide for those I work with. I pride myself on my authenticity and raw truth with my work but in realising this half lived life, I saw I wasn’t able to bring my full self to my outer world through my work, or with my family and friends. I felt a fraud! How could I talk with any embodied authority about the initiation of motherhood other than from a place of loss! The Shadow Initiation of Motherhood!
Working with other women on their fertility journeys for a time was a pleasure and a joy until I realised that I was vicariously drinking of the angst, the hopes, the dreams, the successes. It became sore to witness so many women blooming into the beautiful mothers they so hoped they would become. It accentuated the sensation of feeling left behind, of feeling forsaken, of feeling broken and not enough!
I had committed to honour my grief, to allow her to surface from the depths and show her voice, let her dance with me when she felt the need to be held, courted and honoured. This was a hard deal to have struck but I was trying to access the grief rather than keep it locked deep within the depths of my womb, leaking and rising in geysers up to my heart and pouring through my eyes to be seen and felt. The breaking of Pandora’s Box lid meant I had no control over shutting the lid back down and had to allow myself to unravel and undo, the dark feminine gift of dissolution and death. It aint pretty and hurts like hell but my deep soulself trusted the process, the big egoic death that each turning of my menstrual cyclical wheel taught me, after death there comes life but this wasn’t the life I was holding on to, holding out for…. It wasn’t the wombfull of gurgles and curls, of suckling sleepless nights. No, this felt like endless moons of disappointment and even more grief.
In honouring my need to be with my grief and be with my inner darkness I cancelled workshops, events, clients, clinics. I lost all drive, all inclination to follow a spark to anything. I have dwelled in the pain, under the dark clods of earth deep in the Mother hoping that at some point some of this shitty breaking down might feed and foster a seed, there might be a moment of light, a glimmer that would ignite a new direction, hope and a way forward. I have barely kept my head above water with my work, my responsibilities and my fair share in my marriage. It has been a hard time to juggle so much when I have been in such a dark space. I am great at disassociation and for a time found it easy to park my needs to serve the needs of others. Childhood programming set me up for this story and I have come to see that this is a form of dishonesty, an untruth. Trying to unravel the programming from my teenage years has been a challenge and I know that being fully present to that which arises in me and self-parenting myself is the key to healing these wounds. I have used my mothering years to nurture and grow the wise woman I have become. It has cultivated such a deep knowing and holding in me that women sense and feel this when I hold space. I have mothered myself into being.
I have stepped out owning this grief and vulnerability within intimate circles of sisters, sounded the etheric conch for support. I have shared deeply of wounds that have not seen the light of day and it has felt huge to do so. Committing to heal the pieces of shadow initiation around motherhood has been key for me; finally letting go of guilt and recrimination for an aborted teenage pregnancy that has kept me in torturous loop each month, contorting myself into gleeful hope that conception can happen and then diving deep when my blessed blood flows. What a trapped journey which has strangled my creative juices and restricted my inspiration in birthing anything with Clarity Vibration.
A deep sacred ceremonial ritual enabled me to release the unbearable rock filled sac around my abortion which was so weighted at the bottom of this dark box of Pandora. Sisters held me respectfully in a powerful witness space that unravelled paradigms of suffering. I felt my edges melting and a mythic Becoming in the wake of the recalibration from the ceremony. I have been the cosmic sludge of the caterpillar in her chrysalis. I am yet to emerge and stretch my wings out wide so they dry in a timely way for strong liberating flight. I am yet to know what form I may take whilst I slosh in the gloop, waiting, still waiting… will I even get to soar and feel the wind against my face, will I be the beauty or some dark beast?!
What I do know is that I am still dancing my way around my menstrual cycle, feeling the deep tender call of my womb to birth a real live baby, not some deflected 'project baby' which many feel propelled to spew as a form of consolation. No, to a women longing to be a mother a 'project baby' is a painful distraction. I know I am being worked by this process, I am also conscious of this deep longing becoming a haunting. In time I know it will offer me gold, as all of my deep dark underworld journeys have gifted me. I am always one to mine what lessons and guidance can be shared from such a dance with the Dark Feminine. It brings a richness in working with others and shows me my humanity, it opens a portal from which to work from when guiding others through their own challenges.
I like to be someone that walks my talk, who is authentic and transparent. I like to be a clear talker, for there to be no ambiguity. I am an independent woman taking strong steps to be more open, more and more I am chancing vulnerability as a way to break down the taboos and insidious programming of silence. I take risks which can feel like mortal combat to the wonder woman archetype that reigns so strongly in my maternal line. She is the spandex clad Shero that locks it all it all down and acts like she needs no one, no help and can do it all alone. This is such a destructive harmful existence. This keeps one in isolation and is of the old patriarchal paradigm, stuck and shamed to share when things aren’t all sunshine and unicorns. Its hard to admit that you don’t have it all together, that life isn’t Instagram fit with a gleaming shimmer twinkling back at you through the screen. Shame and silence are like mould spores, they survive in the dark and thrive when starved of light.
Shame and self-blame are huge elements causing silence and isolation with infertility. Very little is said about abortion, loss in pregnancy and infertility. These subjects hold a taboo and those connected to someone who is experiencing these issues tend to struggle to find ways to really offer support. The grief is so weighty and few people can sit with you in the pain. People tend to make a big swerve, change the subject or sweep your feelings aside. It's hard and painful and often makes you wish you hadn't opened yourself up and said anything. Part of my silence in this is also the cruel cosmic joke that much of my work in women's health and wellbeing is around the menstrual cycle, the womb, fertility and sexuality. It has felt like a dirty secret I can't admit. That somehow my infertility means I can't do my job. This I know to be a total illusion but when a trigger comes at the most vulnerable time leading into my bleed, it's bloody hard to ignore the voice of the critic and love myself into wholeness.
So I’m busting this heavy secret out from the depths of Pandora’s Box, I am shinning a light into the depths by loving myself and mothering myself. I am taking steps to stop the self-torture by stopping all sessions and work with women around natural fertility, pregnancy and birth. In truth I haven’t worked in this way much of the year, and as I feel some semblance of return there are things which need updating, it seems timely to formally put this clear boundary to the outer world. I choose to work in ways that are supportive to both me and the women who come to see me. I am an advocate for the Reclaimation of our Full Selves. In creating this strong container for myself and those I work with I give thanks for a space of safety and clarity to emerge so that the way I work is authentic and true for the women, whilst also gifting my tender wombheart the spaciousness to grieve and let go, to receive greater support and understanding.
If someone drops the Gbomb on you when you casually ask how they are??? Please do look them in the eye and say something loving and gentle ‘I’m really sorry to hear your in so much pain’…. ‘That sounds really tough’……even if it’s ‘Wow I don’t know what to say, is there anything I can do for you?’
If the GBomb is about pregnancy loss or fertility be very careful how you might feel the need to rush in and offer advice or try to placate women. This is dangerous ground. Be warned!
Many people struggle to deal with the pain of others as it reminds them of their own unattended pains. They may want to brighten up the conversation or try to lift your spirits. This is not the way with grief. It needs to be held in a loving embrace for it to dissolve in its own time. There is no final recipe to move beyond grief!
Changing the subject, not listening or going straight into why you might not be having such a great time keeps all the doors locked and those Pandora’s Lids firmly closed in someone suffering in this way. The ‘not’ listening keeps the person isolated in the shame and grief. Empathy really goes a long way with those in grief; even if you feel unsure what to say. It helps people feel listened to, heard and held. This is a big part of the grievers healing journey.
Empathy- David Thomas
My reason for sharing this with you all is to stand in a space of athenticity and a place of power. Healing comes from giving voice and shining a loving torch of illumination into this space within. I hope that in sharing this raw vulnerable part of myself and explaining the reason for these new boundaries highlights the need for more conversations like this to be had. Infertility affects 1 in 8 couples and there is very little being discussed about it in honest ways. If you or someone you know is experiencing these difficulties I urge you to find your voice and start talking about it, even if it just feels like whispers to start with.
I would love to hear more from others who are in similar situations or have experienced difficulties with pregnancy loss, infertility and abortion. More conversations need to be had to start melting the shame and isolation. I urge you to start making courageous steps for healing and bring your voice to the world.
|Posted on January 28, 2018 at 5:10 AM||comments (0)|
Today I am writing this blog because I wish to talk about my dear friend and beloved Sister Colette Nolan. We met many years ago at the first Red School Women's Quest Apprenticeship in 2010-2011. We clicked, we got each other, we laughed, we cried and we forged a beautiful connection together. A number of years later when Colette was stepping evermore fully onto her powerful path of demystifying taboos around sexuality and reclaiming the word cunt for all the potency it holds for us as women, she asked me to create a blend of vibrational essences to support her in rooting more into her own authority with her work. This was the birthing of Cunty Love, a blend of alchemical ingredients to support women in connecting to their source power and sexuality. You can read more about how Cunty Love came into being in the Crafting Cunty Love blog.
Me, Jaquie Riqez and Colette Nolan - The Women's Quest Apprenticeship 2010
Colette was working hard with the School of Social Entrepreneurs bringing her sex education program Doodle Your Down There to the world. She would come and stay every month with us in Bristol and I looked to this time with an indulgent excitement that we would have time to hang out, chat about all the things that mattered to us and share our deep heart truth. At the time I was having my own journey to the underworld with multiple bowel operations. It was such a hard time for me and I was so deep in the psychological process, trying to face more surgery and the awful experiences that went hand in hand with such invasive procedures. Colette was a gem and my total confidant. She listened hard and gleamed all she could from the mining of gold that she could see I was doing. I was wading through all the 'wounding' on a spiritual and energetic level that would help me make sense of the open weaping awfulness which was happening to me. I loved the way she took the piss and laughed with me about the whole journey of 'The Arse' as it became so affectionately known, she wanted to send me chocolate ringpieces as a gift. I love the initmacy we built in these times and I trust her with my innermost treasures. It was at this time when she was staying regularly that she brought the Cunty Love aura spray with her and I had the opportunity to use it. It made all my hairs on the back of my neck stand on end, my access sense was totally activated and I could feel the utter magic that was captured in the bottle. It was a joy to try it, to see and sense what I had crafted for her in the fullest sense, we knew this had to be available for all women to use!
Over the years many women have come to me with shock and awe about Cunty Love, it is always a conversation starter when I tour with the Clarity Vibration Essences to workshops and events. I remember once being confronted by a women saying 'Do you know what you've done with this!?' My intial reaction was what, what have I done? Feeling a little panicked. She caught me off gaurd. She was commending me for the paradigm shift that this vibrational blend was radiating. Needless to say women who experience Cunty Love find it to be such an energising vitalising awakener. This isnt just about connecting to our sexuality to create a better sexual relationship with another, it is truly about connecting to our Cunt, our true sexuality as our root connection, to our own authenticity and authority, as a source of our energy and power.
Now the reason of this blog today is to really acknowledge that Cunty Love would not have come about without my dear connection to Colette and her work with the I Heart My Cunt and The Cunt Loving Emporium in her role as Lady Cunt Love. I am blessed to be able to offer this as a Service to woman and her connection to the Sacred Feminine. For anyone who knows Colette you will have seen that she has been on a tricky journey with stage four triple negative inflammatory breast cancer, a rare form which is hard to treat. She was diagnosed in 2016 shortly after birthing her beautiful boy in spain and has been on a mission to heal and to embody love rather than fear in pursuit of wellness and health. I travelled to be with her, it was so hard to see her in the Hospice in Hastings, holding her hand and encouraging her to trust and let people in so that she can heal. I also travelled to be with her in Istanbul where she has been having radical treatment. I was blessed to be with her when she learned that the treatment was working which we saw so clearly on her scans!! It was such a momentus time to see that her body was doing all that it needed to be well, and that the doctors in Turkey knew their stuff with their poineering oncology treatment.
Mary - A blessing to find her holding space at the hospice in Hastings
I have donated as much money as I have been able to give. Large amounts and small dribbly amounts, anything I can give to support her and her family whilst she is having life saving treatment. My family have given money too as they see how much I love her and pray for her to be well. It has been so heart warming to see her community far and wide galvanise together to raise funds to ensure she can continue her treatment. I give regularly through her Patreon page where she shares poems and pieces from the book she is writing. It is a great way to support her financially. There are many other ways, events on social media and crowdfunding pages. Colette shares much of her experiences on her vlog so people can get a glimpse of how it is to live as a young mother with cancer. You could also run fund raising events yourself if you feel called to. A regular event which Colette loves is Cunt Craft and you can bring this to your own community or Red Tent if you wish. See Rachael's Moontimes blog for more details. As Rachael says if Cunt Craft is a little risque for you or your community then Vulva Streamers, Yoni Banners or Fanny Flags may be a way of framing it .... whichever works for you, it doesnt matter as long as there is a way for money to be raised for Colette.
Cunting all Around the World - Cunt Craft Bristol 2012
To support me in giving money to aid Colette I am donating 10% from each sale of Cunty Love. This isnt a self promotional stunt! I would like to be able to give more but I keep the margins low so the aura sprays are accesible for people. I want to find more ways to be able donate to Colette's healing treatment and to also help her strong loving husband Tim so that he doesnt have to fret about where money is coming from, to pay bills or buy food, and for all the things that little Zeb needs as a growing toddler. Of course if me doing this prompts you to buy more Cunty Love then brilliant, order away. I want to be able to give to Colette in a sustainable way and doing this helps me to do so. Ultimatley I hope this blog highlights Colette's situation and encourages you to offer support yourself. You can do this through some of her donating gateways so she can access the cash more readily. Having treatment in Turkey is not cheap and she needs to have someone with her at all times as she is unable to be on her own. Colette has been quite unwell of late and her need for financial support is ever more important. Please see if there are ways you can help. Consider trading a coffee you might buy weekly to a regular drip feed donation. Every bit helps, small, large whatever you feel moved to offer. We will all be so grateful.
Colette recharging at her favourite magnolia tree in Istanbul
So much love radiating out to Colette, when thinking of her and sending love please visualise Colette whole, healed, complete and vital. If wishing to send energy and healing please focus this into her beautiful bones, deep into the marrow where the new cells are formed. See them cancer free, vital and healthy. It is so important to hold the highest frequncy for her.
From the depths of my wombheart I give thanks for your love and support of my dear sister Colette. x
|Posted on July 21, 2017 at 11:10 AM||comments (0)|
Reframing, reclaiming and revisiting menarche for women of all ages has such a potent healing capacity. I see it over and over again with women attending my ceremonial circles. They come with a heavy load, often energetically being dragged behind them. The baggage may be physical or emotional, however it shows up, it is exhausting to drag such a thread along trying to function and keep it together, to be 'normal' - what ever that may be (FYI there is no such thing, normal is a total illusion). Some are conscious of this weight, others less so. Either way the day helps women come together and unpack what was lacking at this important threshold, the maiden who was so sensitive and permeable at the time of first blood takes on all that orbits her at this foundational time whether posititve or negative. It sets the tone on how the rest of their feminine life unfolds and affects self esteem, confidence, appitude and self belief. It impacts many aspects of life women dont actually realise initially!
Many women write before hand, nervous of being in circle, anxious of their woundings being seen or judged for what ever reason. Sometimes it is just part of the process and being witnessed in circle is part of the healing balm, being seen in the loving transformation by others helps validate and hold the power of the moment. Other times there is much that a woman with deep wounds or trauma needs, and it can be too painful or trixy to be in circle. One to one menarche work enables women to really visit parts of their psyche that they perhaps would feel limited or restricted in shining a light on in a group. Many times women wish to join a circle but the dates never tally or the geography is too great so working via skype opens up all possibilitites for healing. It is actually an intimate process, which at the inception of this way of working, through the ether via skype for me in the Menarche process I was unsure. However the many women who have I have walked alongside on this journey have found it to be personal, powerful and hugely transformative.
We meet intially to discuss the process via skype and get a sense of the story or experience needing to be met in the unforlding of the Menarche process. There are then prompts and questions sent to help unravel the years of patterns, challenges or health issues. During the 4 week process we remain in contact via email and you receive guided visualisations, audio recordings and medtitations to deepen and anchor the journey of reclaimation for your maiden self. This is a feminine process of soul retrieval which supports calling all unmet, denied, banished aspects that need loving and welcoming back in for wholeness, integration and authentic healing.
I craft a unique Clarity Vibration essence blend to hold and support you in the dissolution process, to you give ground and offer a loving container for what ever is needed for you. These are bespoke vibrational essences made from flower, plant, light, crystal, environments and are deeply alchemical. We then come together through via skype for the ceremonial process, this is personal to each individual and elements of the journey are woven into the experience for a truly medicinal, soul healing rite of passage, a crossing of a threshold with a full presence and awareness which enables you to access your own reset button. Marking this time with loving awareness with guidance and support gifts you a grounding presence in your life that was previously missing. Many women speak of the ripples and waves of the experience reaching far beyond the moment in time and it truly is a magical reclaimation of the maiden self. It makes such a difference to a woman's life, enabling her to walk forward along her path, surefooted, following the labyrinthine spiral journey of awakening to your power as a woman, as woman who bleeds, as a women who honours her womb wisdom or a woman wishing to bring all the power of her bleeding time into the threshold of Menopause; of holding her wise blood and stepping fully into her power.
Do get in touch if you would like to learn more about this one to one process.
To go straight to the webshop and book a One to One Menarche Journey click here
Love and deep Womb Blessings x
|Posted on February 11, 2017 at 10:45 AM||comments (0)|
Welcoming the Hag
I cry a song from my womb
of pain, of shame, of guilt.
I cry a song from my womb
of despair, of neglect, of rejection.
I cry a song from my womb
of isolation, of unacceptance, of separation.
It is now as my blood comes,
I hear Her voice flowing out to be witnessed in release.
This blood aspect of the crone is not being met, her inner winter is bleak, barren and inhospitable. She is unwelcome by others, she is shunned and rebuked! Oh how I deeply welcome her into me but feel the conflict arise as I harbour this unwelcome Hag. She is one of ‘selfish desires’ – of self-care, of rest, of silence. How dare she? I hear her deep voice of wisdom call me home to rest deep within the earth, cradled for a while to ease my weary bones. I cannot rest, I cannot stop, I steel moments above ground to deny her presence to the external world. This house guest consumes so much time and resource. Really must she stay so long and so often?
I return to her soothing balm of solace and lie awhile as she strokes my head and I feel the weary pain subside. The man of the house does not like her! He never invites her in or welcomes her. The old Hag doesn’t listen to him, nor does as she is asked. This damn woman and her icy ways has a mind of her own and just ignores him. He doesn’t see her beauty, he only sees her flaws; she smells odd to him too, musty like the earth and rich like iron. He doesn’t understand why his wife would entertain her and court her wishes so frequently, and with such attention. Why is she absent from him, neglecting him and her duties?! She is incapable of entertaining anything else when this Hag is here.
She knows there is no choice but to surrender to the Crone’s presence. Fighting her only causes deep distress. She has learnt it is better to feel the wrath and admonishment from him, than to be scarred and bent by the denial of the Crones importance. For in denying Her she bestows pain to awaken attention to that fleshy warm fold, the nest which is the gateway to all realms, the void where creation is birthed.
She Wolf - Artist Unknown
Over time I have come to know that my womb is the seat of my power, it is Her in the driving seat but together we journey where ever I choose. She drives my vehicle as if we are on the run, running from conflict for being my WildSelf, from listening to my blood, from speaking my truth, from Being. I am guilty of listening to the whispers, the cries, the howls of my WildSelf. My frequency is now tuned to this channel from a Greater Power, these words over play any other sound or communication. This he cannot understand. The channel has tuned me to my blood as a sacred practice, a journey to spirit and source. This wisdom is unlearnable, I cannot turn the transistor off, for once She has felt me receive Her, I will never be allowed to neglect this pearl of truth again. It is embedded deep within my bones, churning my inner waters, which flow from me. I know now it is been this way for aeons and aeons, the moon talks with the tides of my oceans, pulling me, moulding me and weathering me. It softens my edges in the wake, tumbling away distortions that no longer resonate. I too will become a pearl, beautifully shaped by the Mother, layers of wisdom and grace formed across time tumbled together. Will he recognise me? Will he still know me? Will he come to love this cherished old being too as I have now so many moons have passed?
The Crone calls me to my Priestess self, I am called to attention to do the Work, the very essence of my being which yearns to be above ground, to feel the winds of time for all to see. Each moon She calls me deeper into union with Her, I know I am needed out in the world in my fullness, whole and present to the four inner women that dance around my womb as the cauldron of my being. I know this fully from sitting at the foot of the wise old Crone, receiving her radiating wisdom which calls me to my true self; whole and present to all my aspects. It is only in this full integration that I may birth the core of my being through my work. I stand with open arms welcoming my fullness, breathing in my WildSelf, my Maiden, my Mother, my Maga, my Crone. I am open to receive the medicine from each woman pouring her gifts into my bowl of creation, so that I may dance to my own song.
She by Lucy Pierce
In owning this beautiful soft, wrinkly woman of love and calling her into me I stand openly to my Beloved. It is only in the denial of her that the fearful gruesome aspect is seen, this Crone is the bringer of death but she also gifts rebirth and that is the natural order of things. Each month something shifts and dies and I have the opportunity for change and growth, which brings new life. Yes she is trixy, outspoken, and difficult too but she is wise and loving, and has magic in her bones. She gives of me so much and for that you must see. In loving me, you welcome all these women into our house. I am a full woman, I am a bleeding woman, I am a changing woman. Persecution, shame and judgement cannot touch me now nor push me to conform, for I am protected by these circling women dancing around my core.
Balance - Artist Unknown
As women we need to be fully met in all our guises and aspects. Society has long shaped our way of being and imposed unrealistic beliefs onto us as women. We have pushed the unpalatable aspects far into the shadows for acceptance at the expense of our health and wellbeing, and to the detriment of our greater community and our beautiful Earth. To be a complete woman, is to be whole. To be loved and valued in this place as such, it is that which enables us to give of ourselves fully to the world.
Honouring each aspect of the self through Menstruality consciousness enables women to come fully into being. This awareness and mindful practice reclaims missing denied aspects of the psyche. It heals trauma, pain, shame, abuse and disconnect to name a few. It is a deep process of remembering which brings profound healing through courting the elements of challenge and conflict. With Menstruality mindfulness at each phase of the cycle there is a greater awareness of our triggers, our core wounds and how we can best serve ourselves into healing. This work brings a greater awareness of tenderness and loving compassion for the self, it fosters integration and cultivates a whole new way of being, and it is a way for women to come home to themselves.
Relationship healing is possible through this work, in meeting ourselves fully we are better equipped to meet others from a place of holding, authenticity and truth. This modality helps to heal on a physical, mental, emotional and spiritual level and is not limited to symptoms just associated with your period. If you would like to book a Menstruality Mentoring session to work with me on which ever aspects are present for you then please get in touch.
|Posted on July 13, 2016 at 8:00 PM||comments (1)|
I am happy to share that the Clarity Vibration clinic space is now open and ready to have one to one sessions and hold people for events. The space is held in such a gorgeous spot in the Blackdown Hills, between Hemyock and Dunkeswell. You can come to see me for a variety of treatments or sessions. You can read more about the offerings and prices for this on my fees page.
Springside clinic booking times are 10am until 6pm, wednesday, thursday and friday. You can call me on 07596 409354 to book your appointment. If you wish to join me for any workshops or events and experience Springside and all the wondrous plants and magic here on the land then please check out my events page.
I start practising from Neal's Yard Remedies therapy rooms in Taunton on Monday the 18th of July 2016 and you can book in to see me from 4pm until 8pm. I will also be in shop during the day to guide you with wellbeing and beautiful organic skincare. You can pop in and join us for a tasty cup of herbal tea, which ever has been chosen for the urn that day and learn more about healthy ways of being. You are welcome to come and meet me and you can book in for a free 15 min chat to see if I am the best person to support and guide you with issues you may be facing. If you would like to book direct with the clinic you can call them on 01823 253430.
If you need any more details on sessions and how I may be of support for you then do get in contact and we can talk about the issues or situtaions you are facing.
Bright Blessings Clare
|Posted on July 8, 2016 at 9:20 AM||comments (0)|
How might you have honoured your femininity at the point of your first period?
Why would you even wish to do this some may ask?
If this time in your life is long gone and past why would you want to revisit it at all?
What is there to gain from going back to this time in your life?
These are some of the many questions women ask when considering whether a Menarche Ceremony is right for them. Many women are unaware of the potency of this time in our lives and how crossing this threshold in a healthy healed loving way helps to shape us as whole women. Marking the first period of a young girl is an important rite of passage. This welcoming to womanhood helps to foster healthy relationships with our body, our family, our community and society as a whole. If we are not received fully in our innocence as a young woman when our blood arrives this disconnection is felt on a cellular level, this message of something not being right or held echoes through our bodies, our minds, our knowing that something of ourselves is not welcomed. This experience causes fractures in our psyche and affects how we relate to our world; the outer, as well as our inner world. Often this isn’t felt immediately, sometimes this disharmony speaks to us over the years as menstrual discomfort, gynaecological symptoms, relationship difficulties and self-esteem issues.
Often women don’t realise the importance of reclaiming this time in their lives until they see the missing space inside of themselves through disconnect or disassociation. Many women are awakening to a way of deeper intimacy and relating in their interpersonal lives. Honouring your Menarche, revisiting this sacred initiation into womanhood helps to call missing aspects of yourself back to this point in time. It is an act of loving self-compassion to communicate with your maiden self, to give her a heart held hand on her journey to wholeness. The psychic energy that surrounds a young girl at menarche means she is sensitive to ethereal, energetic forces. Menarche is her path of individuation, an opening and a flowering. The blood is rich in stories and connects her to her lineage and ‘blood line.’ When women gather in circles the stories they share become the new creation story, the new myths that guide our times. The knowledge truly comes from gatherings, we learn collectively and subliminally which in turn nurtures our belief systems, and the way we look at ourselves as women.
Indigenous cultures honoured the menstrual moon time as an opportunity to gather and cultivate spiritual wisdom for ‘all our relations.’ Visions and dreams and guidance would be acted upon by the community. How the maiden is held in the psychic sensitivities sets up a pattern for owning her femininity in her life. Menstruality is a means of selfknowledge; we learn how to embrace the lunar cyclical female mode of being rather than the solar, linear more masculine, constant ‘on’ way of being. Accepting our changing faces of womanhood throughout the month and acknowledging the symptoms that arise when the feminine aspect is denied helps women to truly find themselves and come home to their core being.
The Menarche Ceremonial day is for women of all ages, menstruating or not, pregnant, breast feeding or postmenopausal. This is a day of sacred space and an opportunity for women to gather in circle and share stories, to set the intention to move beyond any ‘old’ out moded or detrimental ways of being and burn them together in a fire ritual. The Menarche Ceremony is a way of reclaiming the lost parts of the maiden self which often become supressed through upset, disappointment or shame along our path in life.
The aim of this ceremonial work is to connect to that time, to re-vision how you would like to have been received by family or loved ones at your very first period. The opportunity to be welcomed and celebrated for the woman you truly are is a potent process which can help on a subtle energetic level to shift tricky patterns, and support healing on many levels. We will engage with the cycle in a safe and supportive witness space to call in healing and nourishment.
Resetting of this Menarche time fosters a greater inner authority, clarity, and encourages an awareness of where you find yourself on your own personal feminine map, with guidance of how to move forward to navigate beyond back out to the world. As we change the frequency and vibration to one of empowerment love and healing with each woman in this ceremonial process, we share this out across the world so all girls and women find themselves welcomed, cherished, honoured and respected for aligning with their true feminine essence. This activation will provide new energy for women to gather up into themselves, and carry back out into their worldly experience.
If you or women in your community would like me to come and run a Menarche Ceremony please get in touch. I am happy to come and work with you and share these teachings on reclaiming your feminine truth and honouring you for all that you are with love, holding and integrity.
|Posted on January 20, 2016 at 11:45 AM||comments (0)|
Smudging is a cross cultural practice that has been practiced for aeons since prehistoric times. Herbs or incense are burned and the smoke is washed over a person, item, area or space. This process of smoke washing is used to clear and cleanse negative energy and is practiced prior to meditation or ceremony to consecrate the space and the participants for ritual purification.
When researching the origins of smudging it is clear that many indigenous communities across the earth have used this practice to help create a sense of sacredness in their way of life, within their day to day lives as a form of connection to the divine. They made offerings to their Gods and Goddess, to Creator, to Source, and Spirits of nature by using gums, resins and fragrant herbs to bring them closer to the divine and to give fragrant wings to their prayers.
Thinking back to the first peoples and their deep connection, their interwoven thread with the heartbeat of the land, their understanding of the plants in their surroundings would be second nature. Eating certain plants would bring different effects and their understanding of which plants could be eaten safely as opposed to those which were poisonous, needing a different medium of use would over time be an incredible wealth of knowledge. These wisdom keepers would have been our earliest shaman’s, medicine people, midwives who cultivated the plant wisdom knowing how each plant needed to be used. The deep listening and learning required from the plants I imagine would have been an integral part of their lives.
The use of tree bark, leaves, seeds, resin, herbs, blossom, and grasses would have developed from the particular community’s landscape. The traditional use of smudging was unique to the native flora in that area and the ceremony around the practice would also be just as unique depending on who the community wished to make offerings to. Each plant has the ability to work in very different ways energetically and the spirit medicine from the plant brings more than just the physical presence of smoke or chemical constituents of the plant. The plant spirit medicine element of smudging is seen as divine and would be key in choosing the plants to use. These plant energies are seen as allies to work with for healing and vitality of spirit. I like to think that plants not only connect us back to the earth, but to our ancestors too, and therefore back to our natural selves.
The necessary ritual surrounding the use of the herbs depends on the background of the user. Smudging is well known in the Native American tradition however it is not solely credited to these people. It has been practiced across many cultures for thousands of years. The ancient Hindu texts reveal this was practiced 6,000 years ago with the burning of incense. Smoke purification was performed in Egypt, with well-known sacred resins such as Frankincense and Myrrh. It was practiced in Babylonia, Greece, Rome, Japan, Tibet, China, Mexico, among the ancient Hebrews, and among indigenous tribal cultures around the world. Catholic and Orthodox Christianity use incense in religious ceremonies, which grew and evolved from the European Celtic practices who revered plants as gifts from the Earth Mother, where use of herbs was an integral part of their lives and sacred practice.
In general the use of smudge helps to bring people back into harmony by clearing negative energy, attachments such as anger frustration or emotional imbalances. The smudge helps to wash away negativity so as to connect to the universal energies of healing in preparation for sacred work. The cleansing smoke of the sacred herbs is used to purify the psychic space and creates an aura of protection. The many varied plants provide different energies and are used to honour certain deities or invoke a particular quality necessary for sacred magical work.
Ways you might use smudge –
- To clear old stagnant energy when moving to a new house.
- To cleanse a room for healing or theraputic use.
- To cleanse difficult charged situations and bring fresh energy into the space.
- To cleanse second hand items to clear psychic imprints from previous owners.
- To create a sacred protected space for yourself and your family or home.
- To support in times of low mood, depression or challenge to clear negativity.
- When there is sickness that is ongoing or difficult to shift.
- In preparation for ceremonial or sacred energetic work, healing or meditation.
- To cleanse crystals, sacred tools, totems and other altar items.
- As an offering to your preferred deity or spiritual practice or process of prayer.
- To invoke certain qualities or energies working with the Plant Spirit Medicine Ally.
Indigenous peoples have used smudging as a way of cleansing historically; the common understanding on smudging is how the practice banishes bad vibrations, clearing dense negative energy. Science has shown in recent studies done in 2007 that it also clears air born bacteria effectively too.
‘We have observed that 1hour treatment of medicinal smoke emanated by burning wood and a mixture of odoriferous and medicinal herbs (havan sámagri=material used in oblation to fire all over India), on aerial bacterial population caused over 94% reduction of bacterial counts by 60 min and the ability of the smoke to purify or disinfect the air and to make the environment cleaner was maintained up to 24h in the closedroom.. and up to 30 days for other pathogenic bacteria’. (source NCBI )
It is important to check if there are any allergies or issues with specific herbs especially if pregnant as some have contraindications. Some herbs are also more prone to drop ash, so being mindful to use with a smudge bowl or abalone shell will ensure no burn holes in carpets or clothing. Some types of incense require charcoal discs to burn; often these are blends that have lots of resin which come from sacred trees. Charcoal discs need to be used with fire proof containers and should never be held when being lit as they are self-igniting and will burn.
There are so many different wonderful plants which can be used for smudging, beyond the traditional and more commonly used such as White Sage and Palo Santo. I like to blend herbs and resin myself for specific issues, intentions or processes. I especially like to combine resins with herbs for their fragrant smoke and ability to really shift the energy in a space. My favourite ingredients have been blended into the ‘Clarity Vibration Space Clearing Incense’ which has been made available for you to use and can be purchased from the webshop. (COMING SOON) I hope you enjoy using it as much as I do.
|Posted on January 12, 2016 at 8:20 AM||comments (0)|
My time as a child growing up was spent hiding in bushes, making camps in trees, watching and listening to the wandering nature that passed me whilst in my den out in the woods, collecting blossom making perfume and other wonderful concoctions! I was fortunate that we lived outside of town up on a beautiful wooded hill that had few neighbours who actually lived quite far away from us. It was an enchanting time and one that was foundational to who I am today. In some ways it saved me with the complex family story that was playing out at the time. I felt held by sharing my inner world with trees, plants and the beautiful green part of Devon I was living in at the time.
I was happiest up trees, communicating with nature and feeling at one with my surroundings. I sensed the magic in the unfurling of leaves and blossoming of buds and flowers. Being present to the stillness I listened to bird song gleefully watched the glow bugs in the bank and knew and respected the unusual sacred plants that grew around us. This is where my love of plants, little creatures and the wild comes from. I was let out in the morning into the wild, like one of our crazy dogs and whistled for when it was time to return in the evening for food from a very young age. I am thankful for the age of innocence where children were left to be children, and the concerns of safety as they are today from external influences didn’t restrict my deep nourishment in creating connection with the earth.
The Cypress Doorway Springside
Time passes and life picks you up and carries you along…….
Travelling in ways that help me find and collect parts of myself that have been shattered or jarred over the years, I have been treading a path of self–development, developing my work in natural medicine and healing, and in turn entering a becoming of who I am at my core. I have felt this so acutely over recent years that I feel like the small child wrapped in cypress trees, imagining a world where magic, wonder, sensitivity and healing are natural and flow effortlessly with ease. There has been a sense of coming home to myself. In that alignment I have felt better equipped to be the guide and facilitator for others to find a way home to themselves too, to aid healing and offer support. My work has developed in ways that have served my own navigation home, my own birthing and committed self-care practices to support healing. This has been a process of remembering, of claiming old ways of being that spread back down through the mother line, through my womb and out into the world.
I spent 15 years in Bristol, working, learning and growing. I developed my work and shared of myself in circles of support. I was gifted wonderful opportunities that helped to serve me in my becoming. I made loving connected friendships that fill my heart. I truly enjoyed the wonderful melting pot that is Bristol. It is such a crazy, fantastic place, open and progressive, and intensely creative. My time living on Windmill Hill was colourful and is full of fun memories and I was blessed to spend time with my beloved in creating our various homes. I have always been a good home maker, settling in and rooting, caring for the space, filling it with love and so it has been quite wrench to leave our place in Eldon Terrace. It held me in such a tender way over the last few years with big health challenges and my labyrinthine journey through the underworld to rise and reclaim health; all adding to the collection of pieces of my becoming.
The concrete was always an issue, living so close to Victoria Park and with close access to the M5 meant I could escape the city and return to the green, where my heart’s calling resides. Tending to the plants in my little garden with a view across the whole of Bristol to Ashton Court served me but in the end the traffic, the constant ‘on-ness’, the dense population and the lack of green right on my doorstep pushed me to choose to leave the city and return to the green.
The view from our old house in Eldon Terrace
My husband and I have spoken of this for years and have dreamt of how we could manifest it spending long nights searching websites for houses that could hold us in our next chapters of our lives, crafting vision boards holding our dreams, trusting that the sensation of being outside and on the land would support us and nourish us. We took the plunge in the summer of 2015 and made the changes to begin to make this a reality. We threw caution to the wind having not found a forever home but feeling that we just needed to move and rent and trust that the right place would come to us, to commit to this new way of being, to create the void and allow the new to come in. We put our house up for sale, called in a new place for us to call home and waited.
Cards picked in the chaos of packing and moving
This has been a lesson (another!) in surrender. We have trusted that it will all work out even when there has been panic and fear, have we done the right thing?? Will it all work out??? It has been hard doing the dance of uncertainty, being in constant limbo for quite some time. Sometimes it takes a while for things to land and to hold the vision when resources are tight and the waiting feels like forever is tough. This move feels so important for me, for my work, for my relationships, for family, for life.
Being in this place of liminality has meant that work has been very much behind the scenes, crafting essences and sending out to far flung places across the world which has been so exciting and incredibly fulfilling. There has been no space yet for seeing clients, holding gatherings or teaching events. This has felt quite hard to hold the tension as I have been unable to commit to projects, to work without knowing fully where we will settle and root.
Angel Cards chosen for our transtiton through the void
We then found somewhere that truly makes our heart sing and with a continued dance of ‘can we have it, can we make it’ and the universe really testing us, making us get clear on what we are moving to inhabit. There have been complications with the practicalities of selling and buying houses but all being well we should be moving there in the spring, which is quite apt for a place called Springside! It is a place of wonder with such incredible unusual plants. Home to a man and his family with a deep connection to Stone Henge, there are little replica henges all over the place with herbs and trees that call out for essences to be made. Really as a Vibrational Essence maker this is such a boon to be moving to a place where nature calls clearly and speaks volumes. There is space for Clarity Vibration to grow and be a place of support for those needing it and a fertile place to share wisdom and connection.
Clarity Vibration HQ Springside
Meantime there is relief in knowing where we will be in the coming months, until we move and this feels more spacious and allows a deeper breath. I am able to commit to projects and plan how the coming year will shape up. I will have space to see clients and run events in Hemyock at Springside, which is in the Black Down Hills in Devon, a truly spectacular place of natural beauty and wonder which have been protected as an Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty (AONB) since 1991.
Currently I am able to see clients one to one for mentoring or bespoke essence blends and remedies over skype as usual, but I am also happy to travel to see people in their own homes if that suits for Feminine Mentoring and Menstruality Coaching, Healing, Shamanic work, Womb Blessing and Womb Healing sessions. I am in the process of seeing if there is somewhere I can work from adhoc in Exeter and Taunton so watch this space. I hope to resume running regular women’s groups, teaching events and healing circles in the early summer once we have settled and will share eagerly when we are at that point.
I am open to work across the southwest of England, my base whilst in limbo is in Bradninch near Exeter, so if you wish to work with me and are unsure about whether I will come to you just get in touch to discuss what might be possible. I will still be travelling to Bristol regularly to run events so if you wanted to book something in with me whist I am there do get in touch to see my schedule. I will be slowly updating the website and social media to change Bristol based information as when I have the new details defined.
Do get in touch if you would like to work together and book an appointment with me.
Dark Nourishing Winter Blessings x
|Posted on June 11, 2015 at 11:30 AM||comments (0)|
It occurred to me that not everybody is aware of why you would use Clarity Vibration Atomiser blends or how you would use them, so I decided to share some information about the ingredients and why you would choose to use them over other brands or blends.
Firstly they might look a little mysterious in the blue bottles with the spray top. The spray top makes the product an ‘atomiser’, just a posh name for a spray really. You could be forgiven for mistaking them as special air fresheners; they spray and they smell nice. However they are far more than that. Sure the essential oils chosen are to make them smell nice but importantly they are chosen for their medicinal or metaphysical properties. The smell is part of the action as it has an effect on the nervous system; the oils have a certain energy signature of their own depending on the plant they come from. The blue glass is used to reduce ultra violet light which affects the ingredients, so giving the blend longevity. Like all vibrational medicine, homoeopathy and essences, they are best kept away from mobile phones, microwaves and kept out of direct sunlight.
As well as the essential oils there are many different types of vibrational essences included. A vibrational essence is a name/title/label for flower, tree, seed, crystal and environmental essences. Most people are familiar with Dr Bach’s Flower essence range. They are a blend of plants, tree, environmental and flower essences. Rescue Remedy these days is a well know first aid ‘go to’ for shock, trauma and anxiety. There are literally thousands of Vibrational Essence makers all over the world working with many different energies, harnessing them for others to use.
Burnet Rose Essence
I use many different types of essences from lots of spectrums; I make my own essences from my surrounding environment, plants in season and crystals that call to me to incorporate their energy signature for healing and transformation. These vibrational essences work well to support emotional upheaval, change and transformation and to bring a sense of holding when working on shifting patterns. They bring in a new energy to work with which can be incredibly healing.
When I formulate a blend often it is the essence of a plant or crystal that triggers the recipe, they communicate to me how they wish to be formulated and with what to bring a wholeness and fullness to the spray. They come into being for specific issues or scenarios. The blends are made up in such a way that they can be used to suit the situation. For some the sprays are ideal for cleansing a space, a room or a personal environment. They are great for spraying in a therapeutic setting to clear the space between clients or to add energy to the work the therapist is already doing. They can be used to as a personal body spray that cloaks the user in an energetic balm, a protective space or to place them in a state of healing. They are also great to use in workshops or healing circles where smudging might not be appropriate.
My intention when working to create formulas for use by others is to be a clear vessel, a hollow bone so that the communication of the plant, crystal or environment is clean and untainted. I work conscientiously to be fully present to all aspects of the process and observe many ceremonial practices during the making process. I observe my environment, the elements and elementals, the guardians of the place I am working with. I aim to capture a clear experience for others to tap into and use. I give thanks for the opportunity to work with each particular energy, for the wisdom it brings and the opportunity to share it with others.
Brockley Cave Environmental Essence
On spraying the blends the energy of the essential oils and the vibrational essences are immediately in your space and energy field. They work by shifting the frequency gently around you and within. Often you can feel the direct shift when you pay attention and create stillness in using the blends. They help to bring awareness and presence to everyday situations. Clarity Vibration essences are made in the south west of england by hand with conscious loving care and attention.
I create blends that are available commercially for all to use. These can be found in the Clarity Vibration shop http://www.clarityvibration.com/apps/webstore/
You can also work with me to create a unique formulation for any situation or event that needs support, holding or impetus to shift stuck patterns. If you would like a blend made especially for you please get in touch firstname.lastname@example.org
Bespoke Clarity VIbration Blends - 100ml Atomiser or 30ml Dropper
If you would like any information on ingredients or blends or would like to discuss having a blend made for you please make contact.
|Posted on March 18, 2015 at 11:35 AM||comments (0)|
Birthing Woman - Lucy Pierce
Exploring the sacred energies of birth and the inherent innate body wisdom we are gifted as women as part of my Shamanic Midwifery training, it seems totally natural and in keeping that bith is the ultimate initiation and rite of passage that leads us into the depths of shamanic transformation. Women have birthed for aeons in natural ways, without intervention that enable hormones to gift access to states of euphoria and ecstatic bliss.
Below are some words from 'Birthing as Shamanic Experience'
Giving birth naturally, according to Vicki Noble, is a "peak shamanic experience" for a woman (Shakti Woman). When women give birth in wide-awake consciousness, we are given the opportunity to know how we are in relationship with the mysterious creative life force.
Our body-wisdom knows how to birth a baby. What is required of the woman who births naturally is for her to surrender to this body-wisdom. You can't think your way through a birth, and you can't fake it. In some spiritual practices, much attention is given to the process of the rising kundalini at the base of the spine when one enjoys various "openings" in the pursuit of enlightenment. Barbara Walker refers to kundalini as the "Tantric image of the female serpent coiled in the lowest chalks of the human body, in the pelvis."
Giving birth is one of the most profound human experiences of that "opening". It is kundalini moving through the birthing body, rising with every rush of energy that opens the cervix. Not only is the opening felt during these rushes, but also in-between. The opening experience has a deep resting place where the body and soul of the birthing woman gather strength to accept the coming waves of the awesome kundalini as it continues to move through her, culminating in the birth of a new life. When I gave birth, I had the experience of feeling that I was the All, and the All was me, and that we were in this ecstatic dance together. I was the created and the creator at the same times the dreamer and the dreamed, the breather and the breathed. There was no question about "where" my spirituality was; it was not in the sky, it was in the body. It took every ounce of "great pure effort" -- a buddhist teaching of what it takes to achieve enlightenment -- to show up for the process that was moving through me.
If I chose to spend time complaining, the birthing energy reflected that. It was immediate cause and effect. It was not that I had to deny pain, but I was supremely challenged to frame it in a way that would allow safe passage for my baby. I was asked by the Goddess to surrender completely to the experience, and let it take over. When I felt the energy of birthing kundalini as painful, my midwives compassionately guided me to interpret it in a different way, where I could integrate it as something that would take great courage and strength, but that I had it in me to open to it and take it in.
My midwives were mothers too, and had been through the experience. They knew what they were talking about. This made a big difference in how I could create a safe passage for my child. To have compassionate mirrors telling me I could do this made it possible for me to do it. I trusted them. I had to learn to feel the energy of creation as intense rather than painful, and trust that my body was capable of handling this intensity.
In giving birth, I also learned about the nature of surrender.
May spiritual teachings tell us that surrendering is essential to spiritual well-being. We need to learn that we are not the centre of the universe, and to be open to outcome. When a woman gives conscious birth, she experiences this teaching directly. I did not know if I was going to live or die, nor did I know if my baby would live or die. Entering the unknown in full surrender, the mother is in a deeply spiritual relationship with the All.
The Fullness of Life - Mara Friedman
For women in patriarchy, this sacred connection is not acknowledged. What women are told is that we must go to the hospital -- the place where people go when they are ill. And what happens to us there? We are told how to give birth by a male mind (whether it be mouthed by women or men). And in these directives, we are made to feel dependent on what the male mind knows. The male mind says that women need to escape the experience, and take numbing drugs. When a woman is drugged, her baby is also. In that state, she does not get the opportunity to experience birth as a process of enlightenment -- as an awakening of her soul. Patriarchy does not want women to know this power of birth, because men will not be able to control women if women know this power inherent in our beings.
It is my prayer that women will be able to come together and find our "tend and befriend" ways. For some strange reason, or reasons, men fear this power. How very odd, since it is where they come from? Men wind up fearing where they come from, and spend lifetimes trying to be better than this power, trying to control this power, being jealous of this power, fabricating male birth myths to prove they have this power. In the process, they have developed amnesia about what this power is really about and how they are part of it. Until this changes, unless there is transformation at the core, there is little hope for a peaceful existence here on this planet. Changing the faces of the cast of characters in this drama does not create a new play.
The experience of my birthings also showed me the incredible power of sisterhood. My guiding sister-midwives became the embodiment of the priestesses of the Goddess. They completely cared for me and loved me through a most difficult passage. They watched over me like angels, and took care of all my needs. Apprentice midwives stayed with me after the births, and I could just stay with my babies and bond. I was tended to by people who came and cooked, and looked after things until I was ready to resume my regular life. I was lucky to live in a place where women and children were loved. The sacredness of the time during and following the birth was honoured by the entire community. Everyone had respect for a woman who had just given birth, and everyone knew that I was in an altered state. My male partner was able to witness the love of women, and the love of the mother and child. He was able to surrender to the process, and not be concerned about being the star. He was able to be of service. And, he was able to bond with our babies as well. He was not afraid to love them, and did not feel shame when showing tenderness. Witnessing this miracle changed him and opened his heart. He was grateful to be a part of it, and humbled by the magnitude of what women do in birth.
The Goddess was everywhere. It was Her face tending me, guiding me, and feeding me. It was Her face looking back at me through the eyes of my babies, and it was Her arms that held these new beings and it was Her breasts that nourished them.
Sheela na Gig Birthing - Artist Unknown